In a homily given by a well-known bishop on Good Friday, he bluntly stated that the author of our lives came to earth and we killed him. In his attempt to drive this point home, the bishop continued that if Jesus were to come to earth today, we would kill Him again. This statement humbles all of us because it is the truth. I have personally been given the gift of feeling that I know Jesus very well. There have been countless times when I have been too weak to walk and He has carried me on His shoulders. Thanks to His personal and undeniable attention to my life, I know what true love means, and yet, I killed Him.
I have listened to the Passion on Palm Sunday every single year for my entire life (although as a baby and young child I may not have understood it). I must admit to having found myself thankful that I was not alive on that first Good Friday for fear that I would not have been one of the chosen disciples who knew who Jesus really was. What I discovered this year is that it does not matter if I had been living on that day or not–I still killed Him. Recently, this became more evident to me than ever before. I had lost my way and forgotten who God is. I allowed my heart to be filled with anger and I took it out on God. Satan entered into my soul, fed me lies, and I killed my Lord and Savior.
The bishop’s homily also reminded me of how gruesome and horrific being crucified is. I confess that I look at the cross so often, I can forget what it symbolizes. Jesus had to die the worst death imaginable; to this day, crucifixion is considered the lowest form of capital punishment there is. Not only is it excruciatingly painful, but it is humiliating, reserved for the scum of the earth. Jesus took our place on His cross, we are the scum. That cross symbolizes my sins, and they are disgusting and completely worthy of being nailed to that cross.
This year I received the blessing of seeing my sins for what they are and through the grace of God, have been allowed to take my suffering to the cross of Christ and offer them up to Him. Alleluia!! Jesus bore my sins and forgave me. Jesus is who He says He is. Only God, who is love incarnate, could rise from the dead and face the people who crucified Him saying “Shalom!” Peace. Anyone else would come back to take vengeance.
This Easter I am freed from my sins and am reminded of who I am–a daughter of God. The cross also symbolizes the power of God. Only God could die on the cross and rise from the dead. There is absolutely nothing God cannot overcome. This is humanity’s greatest hope. From this day forward, the world cannot give me anything worse than what Jesus went through. I will step into my future with confidence and take on the adversity dealt me by living in this fallen world. It will be hard and there will still be suffering, but I will not fear because God is on my side. So do not cross me!
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Originally published at Kitty in the City
Photo: Pexels / PD-US
