Dealing With Disappointment

Life is hard, and there are going to be days where it seems that your world is caving in around you. For most of us, those days usually involve death, failure, sin, or some other monumental event. Then there are the days where we feel almost as bad due to some big disappointment, but to almost any onlooker there is absolutely nothing wrong, except they might notice you are wearing mismatched socks. Sometimes, these days are actually the hardest to get through. Sure the really hard days, previously mentioned, are tough but during those days it is so easy to cling to our faith, accept with open arms our friends and family, and realize the important things in life. During these other days though, the ones filled with disappointment, these are the toughest because our faith seems so sterile, our friends dont even notice our troubles, and life seems to be passing us up without notice.

These are the days that prove our mettle. These are the days where we sharpen or dull the edge of our faith. These are the days where we have to learn to be strong Catholics, because these are the “little things” which will instruct us in how we will act when it comes to the “big things.”

This wasn’t the post I wanted to write today, nor that I had planned out. I am sort of shooting from the hip here. But I got blindsided by a huge disappointment today. At least I think it is huge. It comes at the hands of those entrusted with my faith life, and those charged with the preservation of the One Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church, here on earth. It left me heart-broken. But in all actuality, it is a small thing, and might actually lead to something better. But isn’t that how God works? When we ask God for something, and we hear ‘No…‘ we are usually so busy throwing a tantrum or feeling sorry for ourselves that we miss the whole answer:

“No… I won’t do that, because I have something Better in store for you!”

There are countless stories about this in the Bible, but for some reason we always throw a tantrum the second we hear that ‘No.’ There is never a benefit of a doubt given to the God that has done so much for us, so many times – we simply will not have anything less than our own selfish desires. We don’t deal with disappointment, we complain about it.

If we were to properly deal with disappointment we would first humble ourselves. The only finger we would be pointing is straight at our own chest. But we hardly ever do this. Instead, we start blaming the failure to achieve our “want” on everything but ourselves. We talk about injustice, unfairness, and how unlucky we are.

Nov. 10 is the Anniversary of the sinking of the Edmund Fitzgerald, a freighter immortalized by the Gordon Lightfoot song of the same name. In that tragic song there is a line that summarizes how many of us think and feel during times of disappointment:

Does any one know where the love of God goes when the waves turn the minutes to hours?

Where is God in our disappointment? No, I won’t get all sappy on you and talk about “Footprints” that is too easy, and too predictable and it sure doesn’t rock you to sleep at 3am when you can’t sleep on some Tuesday because of disappointment. No, the minutes do turn to hours at these times, so where is God?

The best place to find God in those moments is in Scripture. He is there. He is a promise. Even to those captives who had to wait 70 years. We think minutes turn to hours, how about when years turn to decades. What does God have to say for Himself:

“For thus says the LORD: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfil to you my promise and bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you, says the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me; when you seek me with all your heart, I will be found by you, says the LORD, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, says the LORD, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile. -Jeremiah 29:10-14

He sends us into exile. Yet He will fulfill His promise and bring us back. He has plans for us, personal ones, they aren’t bad, but full of a future and a hope. All we have to do is call upon His name and pray to Him. If we seek Him out, we will find Him. He will restore whatever is lost … He will bring us back.

So then, how do we deal with disappointment? With tears of joy. We need to “Get Up.” When you find yourself face-down on your bed bawling your eyes out, think of this verse and embrace it. Disappointment should become an opportunity, it should be the demolition of the walls we put up when we seek pleasure that isn’t God, and therefore we can start anew. When disappointment sends us into exile, seek HIM with your whole heart… and you will find him.

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Read more from Joe at Defend Us In Battle