My husband, Travis, and I are going on five years – five years of wedded bliss.
Of course five years of marriage doesn’t make me an expert but I have learned a few things along the way. If I could go back to 25-year-old, engaged Bonnie these are a few of the things I’d tell my much thinner self:
– Travis snores, but so do you. Don’t complain.
– Don’t take it personally when he doesn’t rave about every dinner you make.
– Calm down about holiday traditions. When you have kids they will help form the traditions.
– Have a plan for laundry. You will hate it more with every year and additional child so figure out something now.
– Travis will tease you about your fear of mice and bugs that jump; think of a good comeback now.
– That comeback could involve his intense dislike of the crunching sound bugs make when you squish them.
– Travis thinks it’s hilarious to catch crickets and put them on floating pieces of toilet paper so they’re waiting for you when you need to go to the bathroom. Watch out.
– When you have kids a lot of people will tell you how to parent. Only listen to Mom.
– When you’re both working live off his paycheck and use yours to pay off debts and create an emergency fund.
– When you become pregnant with your first baby don’t waste any time worrying. Just celebrate the life in your womb.
– There will come a day when, while reading aloud to Travis, you pronounce monotonies “mo-no-to-nees” and he’ll just smile and say, “That happens sometimes.” He’s that kind of a man. Keep him happy.
– Don’t complain when he wants to hang out with his friends or family, just graciously support him.
– White carpet is a bad idea, dark tan is as light as you can go until your children are all grown.
– Don’t compare yourself to others.
What would you add?
5 thoughts on “a good marriage”
Oh these are so good! I may have to do a post of my own inspired by this!
Loved this post. So entertaining. 🙂 And I agree with Kaitlin, I might have to try this out myself!
Great list! I just thought what you said about laundry the other day.
A widow once wrote that if she had to do it all over again, she would never complain about the small stuff. If only she could see his socks on the floor and the toothpaste mess in the bathroom one more time. That thought has kept me biting my tongue for over 31 years!
Your list is so sweet. I feel very old because when I read it, I think “oh how dear…babies and crickets and learning each others quirks”..the sweetness of young love. Im so old, I dont think I even qualify as part of the JP2/B16 crowd, but I really sincerely hope that 5 years from now your list is as sweet as this one was.
My list to my young self would include “in your marriage your worst fears will come to fruition…he acts like he doesn’t want to be married because he doesn’t. He will someday want to be married to you but that will take years and be learned in a crucible of pain. God will give you the consolation of knowing that he is indeed the husband that He chose for you. God will stay with you in the moments when you are abandoned and alone and unloved and He will additionally bless you by allowing you to use the pain from that time to serve others. As a young wife, your husband seems like your whole world…keep a sense of who you are and what you have to offer to survive your trials. “