This was the title of a song by the artist Dido. I listened to her music almost nonstop for a period during my teenage years. Her songs allowed me to imagine what I wanted my life to be when I grew up. As a teenager, I struggled to fit in so I looked to music and movies to inspire me and motivate me to achieve my dreams of a greater life. I had a few detours that made me forget what I longed for, but somehow in this 33rd year of life God has reminded me of what I asked Him, and now He is showing me how He always fulfills His promises.
“If my life is for rent and I don’t learn to buy, I deserve nothing more than I get because nothing I have is truly mine.” Dido
I have reached a point where I have no use or desire for the things of this world. Everything I obtain in this world comes from God and He can also take everything away. God has taken much from me over the past week, but this is not necessarily bad. In fact, it has been extremely liberating. God strips away everything of this world so He is the only thing left. When I realized that all the attachments and even the comforts of this world could never satisfy like the love of God, I was freed from the confinement of this world.
I am starting a new journey in my life, and it is quite terrifying, but that is to be expected when I actively follow God and leave everything I relied on behind me. Jesus knows the cost of His request; when He asked His disciples to follow Him, several were unable to do it because the price was too high. Nevertheless, choosing to follow Jesus will always bear great fruit.
This time of my life is when many of my peers decide to “settle down” and buy homes and plant roots in one place. This is not the path for me; I have learned not to buy. God has called me to walk with HIm. The words of St. Paul continue to fill my head; He journeyed through the entire world with nothing but his faith in the Lord to carry out His will.
“But now, compelled by the Spirit, I am going to Jerusalem. What will happen to me there I do not know, except that in one city after another the Holy Spirit has been warning me that imprisonment and hardships await me. Yet I consider life of no importance to me, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to bear witness to the Gospel of God’s grace.” Acts 20:22-24
Jesus has called me to walk the road to Jerusalem. I do not know what the road will look like or what I will encounter along the way, but whatever happens, all that matters is that I carry out the plan God has for me. Now, I do not believe that I am going to the physical location of Jerusalem. Jerusalem symbolizes the final destination in my life just as it symbolized the final destination in the lives of both Jesus and Paul. Lives lived for God are not meant to be easy, and I don’t want mine to be. This life is not really mine and therefore of no importance to me. I only yearn for the loving embrace of the Lord. The world is entering into dangerous times, and the Church is under attack. I believe that Jesus is calling for disciples once again to do what was done before–Defend His Church.
