I’ve been mulling over a lot of things lately, but one thread that runs through all the variables in my life right now is simple: home.
My husband (who recently defended his doctoral dissertation) has applied to jobs in a number of different places. We’ve developed our own little ritual, one that I’m sure is familiar to many academic families in this stage. We take time to look at the homes available in a given area, dreaming and trying to figure out if a particular location is one we could see our family settling in. It’s far too early to say what the end result will be, but it’s fun to dream.
Underlying everything, though, is my desire to make wherever we live into a home – a place where we can all live, thrive, and be safe.
One of my best friends, and a colleague of my husband’s, recently left with their young family for a sabbatical abroad. Prior to them leaving, they rented a very small house for the semester. The house had some very dated features, which I remember seeing in all their glory when they moved in back in August.
But by the end of the semester, that house was beautiful. They were renting, so there were no renovations done or anything, but the wife/mother had turned that house into a home, and it looked positively lovely. It was her presence, her touch, that made all the difference.
I’ll couple this with saying that an IKEA recently opened up a reasonable driving distance from our house. Have you ever been to an IKEA? It’s like a living Pinterest. I love wandering through all those staged rooms, getting inspiration for our home.
But let’s be honest – we’re still living on a grad student budget. I’m not filling the cart as I troll the aisles. I’m mostly just dreaming, and planning future purchases (or planning what I can look for on Craigslist for a tenth of the price).
But that dreaming matters. In fact, I think it matters more than the actual purchase. Having a mother or a wife as the heart of a house – loving it and its inhabitants – is a big part of what makes a house a home. It is her love that makes all the difference. This isn’t exclusive to women who are staying home, either. There’s such a real value to the role of homemaker, regardless of how many hours you have to devote to the job.
The job of homemaker matters. What you are doing for and dreaming of for your family matters. Even your home decor Pinterest boards matter.
If no one has told you that today, let this be your reminder. Your vocation matters.
(This post appeared first on My Domestic Monastery.)
3 thoughts on “Rediscovering the Vocation of Homemaking”
Thank you for this lovely article. I hope you and your husband attain the position and location you truly hope for.
I think you are on to something. I returned to the Church in 2006 and am at a much later stage of life. My husband (also now Catholic) and I have now been Catholic at two homes. This latest one is not large but I spend time making it comfortable and beautiful in its basic simplicity. I have a corner in the study (yes I am studying theology too!) with the most beautiful statue of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. I also have a prayer corner in the house.
As a start to beginning the Catholic makeover I think less is more and also there is true beauty in good fabrics and so on. But the essential beginning is a place for the Sacred Heart of Jesus, Mary or both. I find a quiet not public part of the house but not shut away either is best.
It is an art and a quest for domestic beauty and avoids luxury.
Thanks so much, there is so much hope in those coming along.
Why is homemaking something limited to women? I’m glad you like this work, but there is no reason it should be assigned by gender.
That is a great point to raise. But I think you over represent the author’s statements. She is writing from her personal experience…which is as a woman, wife and mother. This of itself doesn’t positively deny homemaking as the art of making a home beautiful or pleasing to any male person.
Taking the male presence of itself I would say males can positively express the beauty of homemaking in two ways. One is particular as a male expression which is making and building in order to provide protection and order as structure for the household and or family. Secondly, in the interior design and various arrangements within the home. I think this work denotes the feminine presence in particular but when men take it up it is well within their male role to do so…in one way the male presence in the world can be understood to denote the male distinction in order that the feminine presence is disclosed. There is no competition only complementarity.